"That aching for an answer to “How could this happen?” becomes even more painful when those struggling include those we love. And it is especially hard for us to accept when those afflicted seem to us to be blameless. Then the distress can shake faith in the reality of a loving and all-powerful God. Some of us have seen such doubt come to infect a whole generation of people in times of war or famine. Such doubt can grow and spread until some may turn away from God, whom they charge with being indifferent or cruel. And if unchecked, those feelings can lead to loss of faith that there is a God at all."
We have a goal as a relief society presidency this month to pray for half an hour everyday. At first I did great and I loved the time I took to speak to my Father in Heaven, but when the deep struggles came it became harder and harder until I was barely managing to say my morning and evening prayers. I cannot pinpoint exactly why I struggled with praying but it was a moment of checking myself today when I really saw what was happening in my heart. The thought kept coming back gently to my mind to not turn away from God in times of need but to turn to Him completely and rely on the Atonement. I love a later part of that same talk that says:
"My purpose today is to assure you that our Heavenly Father and the Savior live and that They love all humanity. The very opportunity for us to face adversity and affliction is part of the evidence of Their infinite love. God gave us the gift of living in mortality so that we could be prepared to receive the greatest of all the gifts of God, which is eternal life. Then our spirits will be changed. We will become able to want what God wants, to think as He thinks, and thus be prepared for the trust of an endless posterity to teach and to lead through tests to be raised up to qualify to live forever in eternal life.
It is clear that for us to have that gift and to be given that trust, we must be transformed through making righteous choices where that is hard to do. We are prepared for so great a trust by passing through trying and testing experiences in mortality. That education can come only as we are subject to trials while serving God and others for Him"
Heavenly Father does truly love each of us and suffers when we suffer and weeps when we make mistakes. He wants us to live with Him again and to have what He has. He will help us to get there if we rely on the Hope the Atonement of Jesus Christ in our lives.
